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Brandeis University's Community Newspaper — Waltham, Mass.

Sexcapades: Summer lovin’?

Published: April 29, 2011
Section: Opinions

I don’t know how this happened already, but it’s almost summer vacation. And while for some of us that means our last few weeks of freedom (especially once exams are finished) before we start our new grown-up lives, most of you will really just be going on summer vacation, with plans to return to Brandeis in the fall. The question at this time of year is always the same: Should we continue our relationships into summer?

Personally, I’ve always been a fan of the summer fling and, let me tell you, I’ve had some pretty amazing ones. The summer before my junior year, I met a kid outside a bike shop while going to put air in my tires so I could ride to work sometimes. He was tall, athletic, cute and funny, and he was a photographer—a personal weakness of mine. I found out later we’d actually been in the same kindergarten class and had a million friends in common. But the best part was the sex. He was sexy and into me, creative and exciting, and because of his strength we could really try out all kinds of moves.

That being said, I’ve had relationships that I continued through summer,suddenly with the introduction of the excitement-fever that summer seems to bring. Suddenly he was taking me on surprise dates to wonderful places and to outdoor concerts with light shows. There was also an insertion of a sort of lusty existence that had long since left our relationship.

So what is a good plan for the summer?

Should we be making the decisions that get us laid and take us on adventures, even if that means dumping a potential long-distance partner for the opportunity to meet someone new at home?

Or should we instead be stuck with the people we’re already with in order to continue a successful and happy relationship, potentially risking the possibility of booty? Obviously sometimes things work out perfectly and the person you regularly tangle with in the sheets is going to be living just steps from your door; but let’s be honest, how many college couples do you know who live close to each other?

I think it all comes down to what’s important to you as an individual and what the original agreement was in your relationship. As college students, we often like to imagine that what’s most important to us is the sex—after all, that’s what college is all about, right?

In reality though, many of us are looking for some kind of emotional and intellectual connection to go along with physical sparks. Leaving a stable, happy relationship that offers much in the way of emotional support for the possibility of physical pleasure and exhilaration doesn’t seem like a good plan for most people, and I’m not necessarily in favor of it.

But few of my college relationships and hook-ups made it past the semester mark, meaning I’ve pretty much always been single and on the prowl for the summer, which is amazing.

So prepare yourself for the summer by making sure you know that you and your partners are on the same page.

No matter what, you definitely don’t want to reach summer thinking you have a boyfriend only to discover you’re suddenly single, but you also don’t want the opposite situation to be the case either.

Whatever happens, remember that summer is a time to enjoy, not to worry.

There are opportunities all over if you just keep your eyes open.