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Brandeis University's Community Newspaper — Waltham, Mass.

Sexcapades: Do’s and don’ts of Valentine’s Day

Published: February 11, 2011
Section: Opinions, Top Stories

GRAPHIC BY Ariel Wittenberg/The Hoot

Well, it’s that time of year again. I wrote my first column just one year ago, as we were getting ready to head out into a break that began with Valentine’s Day. This year is a little different, since we’ll all still be at school for the “holiday.”

Maybe it’s because I usually find myself newly single right around Valentine’s Day, or maybe it was my parents’ irritation about holidays when I was younger, but I’ve never quite looked forward to Valentine’s Day the way so many of my peers have. And so while this year will be different (if my boyfriend and I break up before Valentine’s Day, something will have gone SERIOUSLY wrong), I still have many of the same sentiments.

My parents always said that Valentine’s Day was a bit stupid in that you should share your love EVERY day and not reserve it for a Hallmark holiday. Don’t get me wrong, I love flowers and chocolate as much as the next girl, but why shouldn’t I get those things all the time? Additionally, restaurants overbook and jack up their prices on Valentine’s Day, knowing that every guy will be willing to shell out a little more just to make his girlfriend happy, no matter how stupid it is. So I say, skip the sappy stuff and get to something a little more exciting!

Last year I wrote about places to have sex outside of your dorm room, so I thought I’d add a few more ideas to spice things up.

1. DO get out of the house: whether you’re having sex or just hanging out, things can get monotonous if you’re in the same place all the time. I know there’s snow on the ground, but the last few days have been nice, and it’s great to put on a few layers and get out into the sun and the snow. Maybe find a buried park bench, or trudge your way onto Chapel’s Field for a great laugh and a little Vitamin D.

2. DO bring out the sexy lingerie: sure it’s cold outside, but it’s warm inside (usually), and that means you can bring out all kinds of lacy nothings to share with your partner. Valentine’s Day is often thought of as the perfect time for these things and in a way it is, if for no other reason than the awesome sales on sexy underthings right around the holiday.

3. DO make a picnic: maybe skip the restaurant and have a picnic indoors. You can cook together and then devour each other for dessert. If you buy sugar-free whipped cream for the sundaes, you can use it later in the evening on one another without too much fear of repercussions later.

4. DON’T make a laundry list: things can be stressful right now, with Valentine’s Day pressure, looming vacation and midterms. Make sure you’re supportive of one another and understanding if something (like restaurant reservations on Monday) doesn’t work out. If you really like each other, it shouldn’t matter if you’re going for a fancy date ON Valentine’s Day or not, it should only matter that you get to hang out with one another.

5. DON’T pick a fight: OK, so you wanted roses but your boyfriend got you tulips (this happened to me once—he thought they were roses, in his defense). Don’t turn it into something it’s not. He did his best and hey, you got flowers! Lots of couples break up right around Valentine’s Day because one partner sees problems where there aren’t any. Don’t be a statistic; be happy that you have someone to keep you warm for the rest of the (LONG) winter!

6. DO enjoy: take a day for yourself or for you as a couple, and do something you both enjoy. Take the time to remember why you like/love your partner and the things you do together.

All this being said, I’m not trying to convince anyone that the traditional route—flowers, dinner, sex—isn’t a good one. It’s traditional because it works. I’m just saying that there are other ways to enjoy being together other than buying a card that sings a love song.