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Brandeis University's Community Newspaper — Waltham, Mass.



November 2005 Issue

The week in sports

The San Diego Padres traded pitcher Brian Lawrence to the Washington Nationals for third baseman Vinny Castilla.
Pete Rose Jr. turned himself in to authorities on charges that he was involved in distributing GBL, a steroid alternative. Rose, who faces up to 24 months in prison, admitted that he supplied teammates with the drug while playing AA ball….

Sun Kills Mouse with Tiny City

Every music fan has their individual dream team: a band compiled of their favorite musicians into one massive supergroup. Yet, with the result of a number of actual supergroups being less than stellar, such as the short-lived Eyes Adrift (featuring members of Nirvana, Sublime, and the Meat Puppets) and the rather boring, formulaic Audioslave, other music fans, and some bands, strive for their ideal cover group. Just imagine the possibilities: System of a Down covering the Rolling Stones, the Polyphonic Spree covering Metallica, Green Day covering Pink Floyd. Even now, the Pixies could confound and astound music fans around the world by covering the one band whos success was dependent on their inventive musical output: Nirvana. While the possibility of any of these musical oddities actually occurring, Sun Kil Moon have taken that very leap with their latest release, Tiny Cities, an entire album compiled of Modest Mouse covers.

Shakespeare, alive and well

Last weekend, Hold Thy Peace rocked Schwartz Auditorium with its production of William Shakespeares classic comedy Twelfth Night, directed by Stacy Lea Horowitz 07 and Sara Tess Neumann 07.


For as long as I can remember, humans have been reproducing themselves through a well-known biological process known as reproducing themselves. Unfortunately, I cant remember anything before my fourth birthday party. I therefore conclude that before that point in time, there were no biological processes. This makes perfect sense. Stop furrowing your brow in bemusement.

A letter to Yalile in the year 2015

My Little Girl,

Even as I write this letter, youve not yet been born, nor am I certain that you ever will be. But no matter;

as I merely wish, if indeed this letter finds you in this world, that it should find you well and happy. Hopefully I will be there at your side, your father: To protect and take good care of you;

to calm and soothe you when you are distressed;

and to somehow show you all that I have found in the beauty of the life that surrounds us…

Once upon a time there was a Shopgirl

The sound of music that is meant to tug at your heartstrings fills the theater and, as sweeping shots pan over Los Angeles, you get a distinct sensation that you are about to be taken on a ride. And, in fact, you are, but its not exactly the type of ride you might expect. As you fly into a Saks store and slowly rise up through the levels, you at last come to rest on a girl standing behind the glove counter. There she is, the shopgirl.

Lay Off the Literati

There is a point where even the friendliest of teasing becomes annoying. We all enjoy making light of ourselves and our choices, but we dont like it when someone else does it. For many of us here, joking about our silly humanities majors is a great deal of fun. Feel free to make the parallel to Jews making jokes about big noses and blacks embracing the N-word. But just like Jews and blacks, we dont want to hear our jokes repeated back to us by outsiders. And for humanities majors, the outsiders are science majors. (For the purposes of this article, I am including the Arts and social sciences and pretty much anything that isnt science as humanities.)

The Boston Tea Party 2.0

On September 1st of this year, the Massachusetts legislature enacted the second Boston Tea Party: dumping Microsoft Office off the hard drives of all the states computers. The basis for the decision was rooted in democracysupporting open standards guarantees that all Massachusetts citizens will have the ability to read electronic documents in the future. Brandeis should follow suit, not just for democratic reasons, but to ensure that all students are able to communicate with their professors using cost-free programs.

The importance of being involved

What do you do with all your free time? Well, if youre like me, not much. This is pretty surprising considering the over 150 organizations, clubs, and sports teams on campus which cater to just about every possible interest from athletics and religion to politics and activism to pottery, and everywhere in between. Even just showing up at Chums with some regularity can become a social activity due to the regularity of some of its visitors and performers. As Mike Sitzman (graduate student, Biology, 2007) said to me in an interview, When I play Rather Be Giraffes on my I-pod, it takes me immediately back to the college, and will do so forever, whereas someone who never went to Chums wouldnt have that experience even though we both went to Brandeis.

Letter to the Editor #2

To the Editor:
I think public safetys attempts to prevent alcohol-related incidents from happening at Modfest are good-natured, but just not executed correctly. When the rules about underage drinking were not as strict, most people would drink in the Mods where public safety could keep a watchful eye over those getting too drunk.